Religion; a hard concept -

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Well, for most people it's not a hard concept at all. They believe and so they do.

But for those among us that do not believe it's a hard concept indeed, especiall when you're agnostic like me.

What's so hard about it? For starters, there are plenty of religions around the world. We have for example Scientology, the religion of ancient Egypt (yes, it still exists!), Buddhism, Christianity, Islam, Judaism.... and a lot more. And within those religions there are sub-religions. I don't know much about those sub religions in Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, etc... only about Christianity. That's because I used to be Christian myself and because my parents have a membership of a Christian newspaper. Therefore I will mainly focus on Christianity; no offense to people of other religions.

Problem 1 I am facing: Which of the "whole" religions in the "right one"? Is the only real diety Allah? God? Jaweh? Ra? Zeus? Woden?

Problem 2: If one if those gods really is the "real one", then which subgroup does s/he favour? In the case of Christianity: would that be Catholicism? Protestantism? Reformacy? Baptism? Methodists? Seventh day Adventists? Pentacosts? Navigators? Ecclesiasts? Mormons? Phelpism? Evangelist? Lifestream? Christian Science?

I have no clue.

It must be a great feeling to know for sure.

Then why don't I just pick one (the one I like most) and decide that's the one?

It's because that would be deceit. Not to the diety; dieties are generally omniscient; I would not fool him/her. I'd be fooling myself. The teeth of doubt would always gnarl on my soul.

I don't know if there's a diety at all. That separates me from the Atheists and the Deists. (Deists are kind of funnily called " somethingists" in Dutch) I noticed how many people can't see the differences between Agnostic people and Atheists, so I'll Wiki them for those who don't know:

Okay, this agnosticism is a little more complicated than I at first thought, but there it is: link. I'd be a combination of hard agnoticism and mild agnosticism.

Atheism; also a hard concept.

Since both concepts are so complicated, I think it would be wise to explain in what way you are agnostic or atheist.... casue there are multiple forms.

I'll explain for a while now how I am agnostic.

I used to be Christian. When I was 5 or so I was sure the only god was God and that all the other religion were bad and they'd go to hell. Not something I'm proud of. (about the wishing people to hell, that is)
I never really liked going to church (the people in church sang so slowly and the sermons were long and tedious), but that's not why I became agnostic. I mean, there are plenty of "home Christians" who believe at home, prey several times and day and read the Bible and such.
My parents made sure to put me on Christian schools and such and church for the kids, later church for the youth, then church for those who want to talk in private with the vicars and then church for students.

I'm a person who's always wondering and curious about everything, but necessarily looking for answers. I don't dive straight into a subject, make it a project and find out the truth within two days. I'm like: "Hm, how would this work?" and see whether I'll actually find out or not. And I always look at things from multiple sides.

When I was about 16 years old I was no longer sure if there was a god, because of the reasons I listed above. And from that year on I was agnostic.

When one is agnostic it generally means one thinks the existance of a diety can not be proven or disproven. That does no tell whether a person believes there IS a god after all or not. (Agnostic Theism) This goes for most agnosts: I don't know whether there's a god or not. And many agnosts are therefore not religious.

Being an agnost is hard. Not because of not knowing (well, for me it's not that bad), but because of people around you.

I noticed, not only on Basil, but also in real life, that both religious people and athiests sometimes seem to look down upon agnostic people. I hate stereotyping, so the things I'm going to say do not go for ALL religious and atheist people.

There are a couple of things I have been called on basil and Sleepywood:

- Soulless
- Dumb and indecisive
- an attentionseeking, not worth the air I breath, not worth God' s attention scientific motherfucker (I'm not even a scientist)
- an idiot with a head of my ass (my own)
- an atheist (I'm not >_>

- antichrist (pardon?)
- the murderer of my own grandfather (for being non christian)
- responsible for all the pain and sorrow in this world
- a demon
- diablo
- the devil
- inhuman
- " atually u r chrsitain but ur sain ur agnostic cuz ur an attention seeker jas like a friend of mine"
- weak and too dumb to even live (I have been living for the past 22 years just fine)
- EMO cause I probably already know I'll never get to heaven (hell, I don't even know if there's a heaven or not and besides, I know whether I'm EMO or not myself)

Those things aren't fun to hear. (like when a guy on Basil said I was ugly as hell when he saw my picture).

Anyway, what I hate about those particular people is their close-mindedness. They know The Truth and everything that's not The Truth is not only wrong, but is also against The Truth. A case of "If you're not for me, you're against me". En passant the Christians among those people seem to forget that part in the Bible that says judging people is wrong and that you should look at your own faults first.

I alwso don't really like it how people have already decided agnosts and atheist (I created a new noun beacsue I'm tired of spelling out "agnostic people" all the time) have no morals, cause all morals stem from God and that if the world would be taken over by an atheist or an agnost it would become living hell.

Of that I'm not so sure.

I know an atheist boy who, when I was having lunch at his place, kept asking if I'd had enough tea, if I wanted another slice of bread, let's go to the theatre this afternoon..... No, he was not in love with me.
And I as an agnost like to help people out; cared for my grandmother while my grandfather was in hospital; I collected money for an organisation that does cancer research, I helped children in my school with English....

This was all in vain, if I really have to believe a person on Sleepywood. And I should stop trying to get into Heaven, cause God would outsmart me anyway. I'm not trying get into heaven at all. As I already stated, I don't even know if there IS heaven.
She also said I would not be remembered within two decades after my death because of my agnosticism. I didn't quite see the link.
I should get away from Christians, cause my sin would affect them and cause them bad luck in the future. o_O"

Luckily by far not all Christian, or religious people overall, think that way. The vicars of the church I so now and then go to, know I'm agnostic, but don't mind at all. They don't look down upon me, don't push me from them, don't say things like "Well, girl, one day you'll see the light". Nope. They just treat me like another human being.

One of them, by the way, doesn't like the consensus of God being male, so he sometimes refers to God with her and she.

I kinda forgot what I wanted to talk about. It may seem like I'm bashing Christians, but I'm not- it's purely numbers here. I've been called this by Chrstians simply because there are more of them in my direct environment than for example Muslims and/or Jews.

I sincerely apologized in case I offended someone.

Touzokuou

PS: I hate "my truth is the only truth and no other truth is true" people overall; not just Christians. My (agnostic) brother has that habit as well, and sometimes I hate him for it. XD

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