Camp. - - Profil3

Gah-cakes, heading to camp tomorrow (July 8th) for two weeks, and I won't be back until the 22nd.

I'll see ya'll when I get back! Try not to have too much fancy fun without me. =O

*The Legend of the Succulent Ham

There once was a small Ham, named Wilkinson. Little Wilkinson dreampt of one day growing older, wiser, and more importantly, more succulent. It was a very important aspect to the hams, that a ham grow up to have a high ratio of succulence. To achieve such a succulence that giraffe's would collapse as you walk by them, would mean that you have achieved perfect nirvana. Wilkinson trained day and night in the art of Fanciful fanciness (including whale riding, salmon slapping, and other such joyous activities) slowly gaining more succulence, day by day. One day, he felt he was succulent enough to take on.. the Ultimate Master.
The Ultimate Master was revered by all Hams as the most succulent of Ham's to ever exist, however, he had yet to achieve perfect succulence. Wilkinson wished to defeat him in a duel of the fancy, and hopefully achieve perfect giraffe-collapsing succulence.
Wilkinson approached the mansion where the Ultimate Master was said to live. Instead of knocking patiently on the door, however, he used his super-attack, the Succu-Bomb. The door was instantly shredded to bits, and Wilkinson gained entry to the main chamber. And a vast chamber it was, lined with photos of Cakes, Pies, Pastrys, Donkeys, and all of the most succulent of foods. Scattered along the floor, however, were none other than... SUCCULENT ENHANCERS!
"Aha!" Wilkinson exclaimed, "The Ultimate Master is nothing but a fraud. I shall see that he is put to an end!" No sooner had he finished uttering these words, than the Ultimate Master had appeared before him to a flash of light, and a rhythm of smooth jazz.
"Ah... Wilkinson." He said, "I've been expecting you. I have watched your progress, and I must say, I am quite impressed. However... you have only begun to taste the true power of succulence!" With that, the Ultimate Master raised one hand, and from it, erupted a silver shining donkey, which immediatley began bucking and squealing around like a crazy fool. "Go, my donkey, shred Wilkinson to bits!"
The Donkey ceased it's squealing and crazed bucking, and immediatley leapt through the air at the speed of sound, right towards Wilkinson! Wilkinson, fearing no Donkey, raised his hands to the sky and created a cake, the size of an abnormally large object!
"Good god," Thought the Ultimate Master aloud, "He's already mastered the Cake of Abnormal Proportions Attack! Perhaps I have under-estimated Wilkinson, a little..."
The Donkey careened into the side of the cake, sending cheap frosting and cream everywhere! The donkey lay in the middle of the batter in a heap.. defeated.
"Now, it's my turn!" Wilkinson exclaimed. "Succulent enhancers can only take you so far, fraud. Soon the whole world shall see just what you are!" Wilkinson leapt forward, right at the Ultimate Master, and used every bit of succulent energy he had to create a giant Lollipop, which dripped with the essence of pure succulence.
"CHEW ON THIS, YOU FAKE!" Wilkinson brought the lollipop up above his head, and brought it down on the Ultimate Master with as much force as a carnivorous salmon body-slamming a piece of Juicy Fruit. The Lollipop shattered into hundreds of succulent-filled pieces on the back of his opponents head, and the Ultimate Master sank to his knees.
"It... it seems I have been defeated." He uttered, "Farewell, Wilkinson... you truly are... the most succulent of all the Hams..." And with that, he collapsed upon the ground...

From that day forward, Wilkinson was seen as a hero to all Ham. He had statues made in his honor, parades led by magical Panda bears, and even the most exquisite of all honors, he had a bakery named after him, which produced many a wonderful pastry. Wilkinson went on to cause many Giraffe's to collapse, having achieved perfect nirvana from the defeat of the Ultimate Master. It was also around this time, that Wilkinson realized.. it didn't matter how many giraffes bowed to you which proved your succulence. What really mattered, was the trust that you had in your heart, and the belief in yourself, which truly proved your succulence.

The end.

Later, guys. See ya on the 22nd.