Dreams... Nightmares.. -

Ahh.. dreams..

Freud believed that dreams are the gateway to a person's unconscious mind. The unconscious was a repository for socially unacceptable ideas, wishes or desires, traumatic memories, and painful emotions put out of mind by the mechanism of psychological repression. Unconscious thoughts are not directly accessible to ordinary introspection, but are supposed to be capable of being "tapped" and "interpreted" by special methods and techniques such as random association, dream analysis, and verbal slips.

Of course, Freud's not the only one to believe that dreams are so much more than a picture show playing in our mind while we sleep. If that's the case then I have my work cut out for me because I'm going to try to analyze my latest dream...which seemed more like a nightmare than anything else.

The interior of the house was simular to mine. The walls, the furniture, and even the various inperfections of the floor that I've grown accustomed to over the years, in my own house. But the people within the house wasn't my family. Much to my plesant surprise, Jeremy's family was living in this house. I fell right in routine without a second thought to the oddity. Rochelle and I watched television until Jeremy got off of work, but he wasn't happy to see me. He was very short, very dissatisfied with my appearance in his house. We fought, for hours it seemed... Bickering over the smallest things. My hair was too long, he hated the fact that I was picky with utensils at dinner, and the smell of my lotion lingered on my blankets.. Things that, before, were considered to be part of my charm. The fight finally ended with him storming out of the house and me in tears.

Some time had passed.. I'm not sure if it was hours, or days, until I seen him with a smile on his face. He was in love with the neighbor girl. He wanted me to leave, and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. I was heartbroken. Of course, being the person that I am, I fought with him as I walked over to this 'neighbor girl's' house. The girl he'd fallen in love with was someone less serious than I am, now. Someone I almost didn't recognize. It was me from a year or two ago. I noticed the time-span in the two me's by the miss-matching of socks. One was bright orange, the other was neon green.

"This is her." Jeremy told me. "This is the girl that I fell in love with."

Sadly.. that's where I woke up.

Reading over this makes me realize that I need to spend less time trying to perfect everything. I need to remember what makes me happy. I'm not as happy with myself now as I was a few years ago. Funny, though.. I feel happier now then I did..

Maybe, I should just go see a head doctor.